I Got My Books!

The title is not very unique and catchy, but it gets right to the point.  I got my books.  I had a short list of items on my Hanukkah list this year and I emailed it in document form to my mom and allowed her to forward it on to anybody that might need it.  Our extended family always picks names out of a hat/cup/bowl to make gift giving easier (although it never is) and a little bit surprising (which it rarely is).  


I didn't know if my mom would give the entire list to whichever family member picked my name, or if she would pick one or two items off of the list as ideas for the lucky relative.  The top two items on the list were vegan books: The Kind Diet by Alicia Silverstone and Vegan with a Vengance by Isa Chandra Moskowitz.  I had been wanting Moskowitz's book for awhile after seeing it in a local Borders store and then hearing rave reviews.  Then after seeing Alicia Silverstone all over the media with her new book, I went nuts with the need to own it.  


Hanukkah passed and I didn't get either book from my parents or my brother.  I had lost hope and was ready to cough up the money by myself.  My aunt was a sly gift-wrapper though, and at our family Hanukkah party I unwrapped an old shoe box and thought to myself, I didn't ask for shoes and why would somebody buy gym shoes as a gift anyhow?  


Sneaky, sneaky!  She hid the books inside the box!  I was quite giddy after that and wanted to run home and start cooking.  The best thing I've found so far?  They both mention tempeh!!  


Oh, and my aunt reminded me, something I never noticed, that both books are by Jewish women.  Is this a trend?  


My brother's girlfriend who was sitting next to me during the gift-opening sessions looked over and asked, "Are those the kind of books you read?"  The funny thing is, I knew exactly what she meant.  Silverstone's book is part informational and part recipes.  So, only partly the kind you read.  Unless you're the type of person who sits down and reads a cookbook front to back.  I haven't gotten to that point yet.  


AND....(yes, there is more)


While helping one of my very best friends finish her holiday shopping today, we happened upon Urban Outfitters and their display of cupcakes--several cupcake books lying amongst other cupcake-themed goodies.  One book, BabyCakes: Vegan, (Mostly) Gluten-Free, and (Mostly) Sugar-Free Recipes from New York's Most Talked-About Bakery, caught her eye and she asked me if I wanted it because she knows I am a baking fanatic.  That's right folks, she hadn't bought for me yet.  She'll get a tsking later.  I told her I wanted to be surprised, so she went to the register and purchased it stating that she would wrap it beautifully later.  

Previous vegetarian cookbook count: 2

Current vegetarian cookbook count: 4

Future vegetarian cookbook count: 5

The cookbook cabinet is in a tight squeeze now.

I Don't Dislike My Hair That Much

It's almost 3am here and on any normal day I'd be sleeping.  My plan was to have my next post be about my latest trip to Trader Joe's, but I find my 2am wake up bark to be more interesting.

Bill, our pudgy little doxie boy, tends to switch between my parents' bed and his (and his sister's) blankie in the loft at night.  When he wants to get back into bed, sometimes he's just too lazy or achy (he has a bad back) to use his doggy steps to get up there himself, so he barks for somebody to help him.  At 2am I got a bark, a rare occurrence since he usually wants to get into my parents' bed and not mine.  It was then that I realized I had to pee.

Upon washing my hands and glancing in the mirror, I noticed an unusual amount of white on my head where the part in my hair was. Because I had woken up and not fixed my hair, it was on the opposite side of my head than usual and messy.  I fooled around with my hair a bit and was shocked to notice that my hair seemed thinner in the front than I remembered.  Panic.  What young female wouldn't panic?

I had noticed more shedding than usual while combing my hair after showers, but I passed it off as a seasonal shed.  I hoped it was.  But now I realize my latent fear is a reality.

My pseudo-veganism is causing me to lose hair.

I sighed and figured I'd sleep on it and talk to my mom tomorrow--or rather today at a reasonable time.  I hate the idea of talking to her about this because she still hasn't accepted my vegan diet.  She believes I'm depriving myself and taking on all the world's problems and suffering for everyone else.  She worries than I'm not getting protein and vital components of a healthy diet.  I can't tell you how many times she's suggested I have a dairy day a week.  Obviously I refuse.  So you can only imagine what telling her I'm losing my hair would do.

Well, I can't sleep.  I turned on my trusty laptop and did a search for the vegan diet and hair loss.  Boy was that a relief!

Friends, the vegan diet apparently causes a type of hair loss that begins 2-4 months into the diet and corrects itself a few months later.  The body recognizes the diet as a crash diet (and the fact that I'm trying to lose weight probably doesn't help things) and crash diets often cause hair loss.  Also, vegan diets are often short on iron and zinc, which can cause hair loss.  I'll be supplementing that, although I'm sure there's enough in my multivitamin.

I started my pseudo-veganism 4 months ago.  Needless to say, I'm not looking forward to waiting for the hair loss to stop and reverse, I want it now!  Who wouldn't?

I'm a little upset.  I'm mostly relieved.  I'm also trying to restrain myself from jumping out of bed right now to go buy supplements and oils to make the diet all nutritious and wonderful.

Omegas (They apparently come in 3, 6, and 9)

For awhile I gave up on looking for an omega-3 supplement that I could take.  Obviously, fish oil is not even vegetarian.  Don't even get me started on those "pescavegetarians."  Flaxseed oil, although vegetarian and vegan friendly, when in pill form is encapsulated in a gelatin monster.  I looked in drug stores and grocery stores galore to no avail.  I gave up.

But then there was Whole Foods.  Whole Foods has everything and anything, right?  So this miracle of grocery stores must have vegan friendly omega-3 supplements, right?  So I walk down the vast supplement aisles in the middle of store and find the omega-3 (and 6 and 9) section.  I find a bottle of vegetarian flaxeed pills and nearly jump for joy.  It does not, however, say vegan anywhere on the bottle.  I ponder.  Not everything vegan says vegan blatantly on the bottle.  I read the ingredients several times over and put the bottle back while I continue to ponder.  And then the inevitable happens.

"Can I help you find anything?"  I don't believe I've ever roamed the supplement and beauty section of Whole Foods without being tackled by a worker in a dark green apron who probably thinks I'm inept at picking out a moisturizer or multivitamin.  This time I do not feel so intellectually violated, but instead relieved.

"Do you have any vegan-friendly omega-3 supplements?"  He promptly takes me to the refrigerated section and shows me a bottle of liquid stuff.  It is pomegranate-blueberry flavored and can be added to yogurt (soy, of course), juice, anything you'd like, or taken straight.  It is expensive at nearly $30 per bottle.  But it is completely vegan.  I go for it.

The first couple of times I put the thick, creamy goop in my orange-pineapple-banana juice.  It makes it slightly smoothie-like.  I prefer my juice the original way.  The next time I take it straight from a tablespoon measure and it takes me a minute to get it all down.  It isn't quite unpleasant, but it isn't my ideal way to take a supplement.  I try it in soymilk and have to add chocolatey powder or I'll gag.  I was never a milk-drinking girl.

Meanwhile I've been getting the runs.  I know, you really wanted to know that, right?  I figure it's a side effect of Thanksgiving or the soy yogurt I've been trying.  I eat better, I watch everything.  I pay very close attention to when it happens.

I take the flaxeed goop.  I run to the toilet.

With nearly an entire $30 bottle of vegan flaxeed goop in the fridge, I realize it is giving me the runs.  Dammit.

Back to the beginning.

A Semi-Vegan Thanksgiving

It is December 1st and clearly I am in need of a Thanksgiving update.

Let me start by saying that I am entirely too jealous of my vegan friend who, with her vegan partner-in-crime (another reason to be jealous of her), prepared a completely vegan Thanksgiving feast for both of their families.  First, that is completely amazing to me.  I am so new at this dance that I can just barely imagine an entire feast of edible vegan food.  Second, the day my family sits down to eat an entirely vegan-friendly meal made by me with stuff they've never heard of before on plates before them is the day the United States gets universal healthcare a la Canada or England.

Thanksgiving is my mom's holiday.  Each sibling in her family has a designated holiday to host and we usually go nuts over Thanksgiving here.  For some reason we were a little more relaxed this year.  Mom roasted the turkeys, my dad attempted a turducken whose parts are packed away in the freezer for later sentencing.  My feelings on that will remain silent for the benefit of my parents and the birds.

The rest of the menu:
*I made the usual sweet potato casserole with streusel topping.  This is the same recipe you will find yearly in Cooking Light magazine.  It is a reader favorite and with good reason.  It is delicious.  I love sweet potatoes even just baked and plain, but mash them up and top them with sweet goodness and they are divine.  I have always made them vegan, substituting the half-and-half with soy milk and using a vegetable based substitute for the butter in the topping so that my uncle can eat them.  You see, my great uncle keeps kosher.  Turkey and dairy don't mix.  (P.S., we always have one kosher turkey and one non-kosher turkey.  I never really understood why we don't just get two kosher turkeys.)

*I also made Alicia Silverstone's rice crispy treats for dessert.  Everyone loved them!  See, vegan is scrumptious.  I'm not sure everyone realized they were eating something semi-healthy and vegan, though.  I feel slightly sly and evil that way.

*Mom made mashed potatoes using soy milk and Smart Balance spread for my benefit.  I love Mom.  (FYI, depending on the variety of Smart Balance spread that you buy, it may or may not be vegan.)

*Mom's cousin made the famous green bean casserole.  I used to enjoy this dish, but I look on the bright side in that it saved me some calories this year.

*My aunt made stuffing.  I'm not a fan of stuffing anyhow, so not being able to eat it didn't bother me in the least.

*My cousin my roasted veggies.  A huge pan of veggies (carrots, yellow squash, zucchini, onions, green beans) seasoned and roasted fit for any diet.  Yum!

*Rolls with your choice of butter or Smart Balance spread.
1
*Mom's cranberry sauce (for some reason tastier this year than in years past, I kept eating it!)

I'm forgetting something, I'm always forgetting something...

There is always more dessert than dinner at our family gatherings and I've realized that becoming an almost-vegan has helped me not over-do the desserts and keep myself from busting the buttons off my pants.  You can't stuff your face when you can't eat it!  As I mentioned before, I made the rice crispy treats which were a hit.  I also made some almost-vegan ginger bread cookies (one humane-certified egg) whose heads and limbs were broken off from a fall when my mom accidentally knocked the container off the counter.  My poor limbless cookies.  And the citrus fruit salad with pomegranate seeds was quite refreshing.

I went to bed exhausted, but not over-stuffed.  That I did the next day with the left-over mixed nuts...

The end!

My Old Pal Parsnip

Back when I was studying abroad in England, about four years ago now, I found myself eating a vegetable side dish that took me pleasantly by surprise.  Long strips of lightly sweet root vegetables fell apart just right between my teeth and on my tongue.  I recognized the carrots immediately, but what were the white ones?  Were they white carrots?  They were a delectable mystery.

I soon found out that these ground dwellers were parsnips.  If you've never run across a parsnip before, I am not surprised.  They taste like a cross between a carrot and a potato--that's the best comparison I've been able to think up.  They look like a white, top-heavy carrot with osteoporosis.  They are amazing.

Several times I have tried to recreate the mildly sweet parsnip at home, but each time I somehow failed.  Once, I learned the hard way that you should peel parsnips first.  Once, I boiled them first which proved fruitless.  They just never turned out right.

After several attempts, the dear parsnip faded into the back of my mind to be all but forgotten.  Some stroke of fate pulled it to the front last week and I was determined to find the recipe the top all recipes for carrots and parsnips just like that first dish I ate in England.  Not only that, but I would serve it at Thanksgiving dinner.  So I went to The Food Network and did a search.  Chef Danny Boome, a Brit himself, had a simple and mildly sweet recipe for carrots and parsnips calling for olive oil, honey, thyme, salt and pepper.  I nearly pissed my pants.  It was going to be the one.  It was written by an Englishman. It had to be good.

And it was.  Even my parents approved.  I was all set to buy more ingredients for Thanksgiving until too many people decided they were bringing vegetable dishes to our house for the feast.  Oh well, maybe next time!  At least my long quest for the perfect parsnip has been satisfied.

**The Vegan Issue**
Honey--it is not vegan.  This is another element of my almost veganess.  Vegans don't eat honey because it takes bees to create it.  Taking honey is like taking bees' food.  This is where I get confused.  I keep hearing that honey bees are raised and bred to make more honey than necessary so they have enough food and enough to give away.  That makes it *okay* to take their honey, but we're also manipulating the bees in some way (is this genetic engineering?  just breeding?).  Obviously we aren't killing the bees because that would make harvesting honey a fruitless industry.  I rarely use it and I don't like the taste of honey itself, so the idea of consuming honey rarely affects me until I come across a recipe like the carrot and parsnip recipe.  I am sure the honey can be replaced with agave or brown rice syrup.  That is the beauty of having so many sweeteners at your disposal.

In case I don't post beforehand, have a fabulous Thanksgiving!

Mushroom on a Stock

Ha, I got you with that title, didn't I?  Okay, so it was lame.  At least I tried.

Today I made mushroom stock, the first stock or broth I've ever made from scratch.  It was surprisingly easy and the aroma filling the kitchen definitely pleased my nostrils.  I was just sad to dump all those delicious mushrooms and onions and garlic and goodies after all was done boiling away.  I suppose I could have saved it for another recipe, but all the flavor had been juiced out.

I haven't used any yet.  We use broth and stock quite a bit around here, though.  Instead of using water for couscous and rice, we use vegetable or "fake chicken" broth to add flavor and depth to the dish.  I saw the mushroom stock recipe in my mom's latest issue of Cooking Light and thought it sounded not only unique and different, but fabulously delicious.  I love mushrooms.

You're probably waiting for the problem.  There's got to be a problem here.  Nope!  Well, I used celery instead of leeks, but that was by choice.  And the oil burned to the bottom of the pot, but I'm letting it soak and maybe I'll fall asleep before remembering to scrub again and then Dad'll do it for me.  Haha.  Wishful thinking.

In other news, today is Ed Asner's birthday.  Happy 80th birthday, Ed!  You're probably wondering what Ed Asner's birthday has to do with my blog.  Well, looking at his filmography (which oddly includes TV) I was reminded of Mary Tyler Moore.  I adore that woman for her charm, her work, and her activism.  And I just read that she's a vegetarian!  Go, Mary!



Sleep well--there's a full week ahead!

No It's Not!

I really shouldn't watch so many cooking shows.  I think about food far too often as it is.  And then you have the problem that 99.9% of the shows involve meat-based dishes so I either start thinking of ways to make them vegetarian or I start thinking about how unfortunate it is that there aren't enough vegetarian dishes on cooking shows.  Or I think about how absolutely disgusting that stuff on TV is.  Let's face it, some of that junk is absolutely ridiculous.

Anyhow, every once in awhile there is a gem.  Somebody decides to feature a meatless meal.  I dance in my seat for a moment before I realize what is wrong with the episode.

Yes, I always find some flaw.  I'm overly critical like that.  I'm trying to improve myself.

Take the episode of Rachael Ray's 30 Minute Meals that I saw today.  Portobello mushroom hoagies.  That sounds interesting to me.  Leave off the cheese and I'm good.  But then she gets down to it and starts actually making the hoagies, marinade first.

What is in the marinade?  None other than Worcestershire sauce.  I'm sorry, but Worcestershire sauce is not vegetarian.  It would have been all fine and dandy had she not gone off on a this-would-be-great-to-serve-to-your-vegetarian-friends schpeel.  No.  It would not.  


This vegetarian's enemy of a sauce contains anchovies.  Anchovies are fishes.  That is very un-vegetarian.  Yes, I rant.  Yes, I complain.  I do not complain about Ms. Ray alone.  She is not the only one.  


But instances such as this raise questions.  What do restaurants use to marinate their mushrooms?  Do we have to start asking everyone what ingredients they use before we order or eat?  Is food going to become even more of an issue that it already is and should not be?  


ACK!


There are vegan versions of Worcestershire sauce in health food and fine food stores, but I've never bothered to purchase them.  I hear much of the flavor of the original version comes from the fish anyhow.  I could be wrong.  


But the moral of my story is, even professional chefs don't always know what they're talking about and it is quite irksome.  Makes me want to write some letters.  

The Piggy Flew

Soooo...

I've been slacking again.

It's hard to post about food when you're sick with H1N1 and have to choose quite carefully what you are going to consume because wait, will a chocolate bar agree with tamiflu?  How bad will the stomach cramps be today with all this hacking-up-of-the-lungs?  


I've been very careful about my food consumption--faux chicken soup with noodles, scrambled eggs, glass after glass of juice-and-carbonated-water, etc.

I managed to keep down some roasted brussels sprouts tonight (lightly tossed in olive oil with salt, pepper, and thyme).  The left over noodles-mushrooms-and-vegan-sausage-combo at lunch didn't do as well.

Did I mention the juice?

Ordinarily I'd jump at the chance to dabble in the kitchen while under a week-long "house arrest" (as I affectionately call it), but I don't want to infect all of the household food supply.  And there's that stomach sensitivity thing.

So, until the piggy flies away, happy eating!

A Conglomeration of Notes

It's been one of those too-long-between-posts again.  What can I say?  Some weeks aren't very adventurous and sometimes I avoid the blog like the plague.  Why?  I don't know.  It's daunting.  I cook something new and think gee, now I need to blog it.  But I also think, who really wants to read about how I put pumpkin seeds in the brown rice and threw it into the hollows of a squash?  Whoopee!  It might have been a first for me, but I bet it's nothing new in the universe.  Blogging takes motivation and self-esteem.

Well, after a certain length of time, a new blog post is necessary so that the blog doesn't die and become just another speck in the universe (or is it already?  This is clearly not the time nor blog for metaphysics).

So now I get to tell you all how this is the first week I've weighed in at a gain since I've started losing weight.  Yes, I know it's natural to have plateaus and gains while trying to lose weight, but the first gain is always frustrating (not that the rest aren't, as well!)

I blame it on the vegan rice crispy treats, recipe courtesy of Alicia Silverstone.  Yea, I finally got around to make those little devils and I didn't even put the chocolate chips in.  Sure they're not bad for you (really only brown rice and peanut butter when you get down to it).  Not bad until you find yourself picking at them all...day...LONG.  I cannot keep my hands away from these things.

I wasn't Little Miss Perfect the rest of the week, either, but I still blame the treats.

In other news, the shelter I volunteer at had a Halloween party/bake sale on Saturday.  Needless to say, none of the goods were vegan friendly (aside from the chips that went with the $3.00 hotdog lunch you could buy).  I stayed most of the day to help out with the dogs and didn't eat anything from breakfast until I got home around 4:30pm.  That's when it hit me how hungry I was.  That didn't bode well when my parents and I went out to dinner at a local restaurant.

My parents really like this restaurant and I was so-so on it after turning vegan.  I decided to ask what the black bean burger was made of so that I didn't have to stick with a bald portobello mushroom on a bun again.  The waitress was amazing and brought out the book that had all the ingredients of the pre-prepared foods and she read off every last gorey detail (i.e. soy protein, wheat gluten, etc.)  I was shocked to hear a lack of cheese and egg proteins listed.  I should add that the black bean burger is actually two of these burgers stacked on top of each other.  Usually with cheeses, avocado, pesto, and crispy fried onion thingies.  I asked for it without the cheese and avocado (I don't like avocado which I guess is a sin against vegans everywhere) and they automatically put the pesto on the side.  It was delicious but my stomach paid for it the next day.  (I ate the whole thing...and despite my choosing the side salad instead of fries, it wasn't pretty).  I'm thinking of writing an email to the restaurant applauding them and the waitress.  Nights like that make me giddy.

Tonight I attempt cooking curry for the very first time.  Wish me luck!

One Single Can

My friends, it is pumpkin season.  I love pumpkin.  I love pumpkin breads, cakes, cookies, spice lattes (soy of course), spice teas, etc.  I even love to munch on the seeds which are quite healthy provided you don't add tons of oil and salt.  I just don't like pumpkin pie.  Call me odd if you will; you won't be the first.

This year I seem to be learning how to use pumpkin in all new ways.  For instance, at the Pet Expo at Arlington Race Track this year, a fellow daschsund-person gave the weenie-slimming advice of adding canned pumpkin to our dogs' food.  We opted to leave the kibble alone as our poochies produce enough "#2" as it is.  I've also heard that canned pumpkin is good for upset dog tummies.  For the same reason as stated before, we usually stick to the rice method of soothing the aching bellies.  But, it's a very dog-friendly food.

When I heard this next tip, I just had to try it to see if it really worked.  Tip: Instead of adding eggs, oil, milk, butter, water, or whatever else a cake mix might call for, just add one 15 oz can of pumpkin and bake as directed.  You're not supposed to be able to taste the pumpkin in the final product or tell that it's high in fiber and low in fat.  Anyone I told this method to gave the "yea right" face.

I blended a vegan-friendly devil's food cake mix with one can of pumpkin.  I managed to fill 18 cupcake papers with the batter.  The batter was delicious and only vaguely pumpkiny.  Twenty minutes later out came the moistest devil's food cupcakes I have ever eaten!  You would never know all those ingredients were omitted and replaced by pumpkin.  I highly suggest having a party and tricking all your guests.  Better yet, trick your children and then tell them they've just eaten a vegetable.  Mwahaha!

I might have to eat another one for breakfast tomorrow morning.

On the Road to Being Less Clueless

I've been watching Rachael Ray's talk show quite a bit lately.  It's not that I love the show or have nothing better to do, it's that when Bailey and/or Bill settle themselves all cozily in my lap while I have a cup of coffee and am in my pajamas and Live with Regis and Kelly has ended, I find it difficult to pick myself up off the couch and get on with my day right away.  So, I sit and watch at least half of Ms. Ray's show.  This really goes to show how worthless my life is right now.  I need a job.  Hire me.  Please.

Anyhow, the other day Rachael had the most amazing guest on.  Well, maybe the second most amazing since yesterday Julie Andrews was on.  Alicia (pronounced Ah-lee-see-ah) Silverstone spent quite a bit of time sitting next to Rachael promoting her new book and her fabulous lifestyle.

When I was in elementary school and Clueless was a hip movie to watch, I must have watched it every single day.  If I were like most crazy little girls, I would have had every line of that movie memorized, only I'm not good at that kind of thing and really only remember one or two lines I love from movies.  They are the lines nobody else remembers, and if I were to recite them to you right now, you wouldn't be able to name the movie for the life of you.  But nevertheless, I watched that movie as if my life depended on it.  I did not understand the deeper significance until much later in my life, but it served its purpose.  And this is how I always knew Alicia Silverstone.

Since then I have heard in passing of her desire to help animals and the environment and that she was possibly a vegetarian.

Dudes.  She's a vegan.  And she wrote a book about it.  It's a book-cookbook called The Kind Diet not only because it's better for the planet but it's better for your body and soul.  I ALMOST DIED.  This was a vegan on Rachael Ray's show.  She was talking about being meat free and dairy free and living a life for the planet and suddenly I was worshipping Alicia Silverstone again.

I have been wondering and pondering and asking around to find out what vegan cookbook to buy.  I only have omnivorous and lacto-ovo cookbooks.  Well, folks, I know what book I'm buying.

I wish I had known what I would be seeing because I would have recorded the episode on the DVR.  Everything I've been trying to convey to my omnivorous friends and family she said so easily and comprehensibly.  I think I squee'd out loud at one point.

And the crispy rice cereal treats (because using the well-known name would be a trademark issue) looked so divine.  I've tried making them with marshmallow fluff, which is gelatin free, but they come out hard.  She uses rice syrup and they come out just right!  I need to get my hands on that book.  There is too much I'm missing out on.

Which brings me to my next point.  I was grocery shopping with my mom this weekend and I could not for the life of me find a good quality whole wheat bread that is made without milk!  What the hoot?  We ended up buying the high-fiber, low-calorie health bread with all the extra ingredients that make it not-recommended to eat, but it was the only whole wheat bread without milk.  Really, people?  Really?  It's wheat bread!  So as we went down the aisles of the store and my mom noticed all the things I won't eat anymore, she reminded me of how she believes I'm "missing out on so much."  Instead of sighing and shrugging as usual, I spoke up and said, "No, I'm not."  If you think like many vegans, you'd think that all those things aren't supposed to be eaten by us anyhow so how am I missing out?  Plus, where there is a will, there is a way.  That is why I'm experimenting with recipes and vegan ingredients.

So, I may start making my own bread.  It's good for the arms and the spirit.  My family baked bread for a living before coming to the United States.

I may also rent Clueless for some laughs and good memories.  It's too bad I don't still have the little tea set I used to have and used for drinking hot cocoa with my friends after playing in the snow.  I'd totally break that out and use it while watching the movie if I did.  And yes, totally just said totally.  Twice.

Boxed Soup

I am well overdue for an update here and although I have no news or adventures to report, I will do my duty as a blogger and post.

I am stuck in a food rut of sorts.  After my bout of stomach illness, whatever it happened to be, I didn't really manage to pull myself out of the bland and boring food blob into which I previously immersed myself. Sure, I'm not limited to merely rice cakes, crackers, and noodles, but my diet is, simply put, boring.  And I lack the experimental bug that started this blog in the first place.

I did make soup the other day.  It was from a box.  Exciting, no?  I didn't follow the instructions completely because the last time I did, it turned out as a paste of bean-mush rather than the 18-bean-soup it was supposed to be.  This time I:

*sauteed the veggies before adding the liquids (aren't you usually supposed to do that anyhow?)
*Added several cans of vegetable broth to add flavor and liquid (in hopes of preventing pasting)
*Cut the simmering time in half

So why wasn't this an experiment?  Well, I suppose it was, just not a complete one.  You see, the finished product has been sitting in the fridge for a couple of days waiting to be eaten.  We just haven't gotten around to it.  I'll probably have to add more liquid during the reheating.  I'll let you know how it tastes when we finally taste it (hopefully) tonight.  'Tis soup season at last.

Now for a shower...and possibly baking some sort of dangerously delicious chocolatey goodness.  Oh yea, I removed the ban.

Nom Woes

I believe the LOLcats and LOLdogs of the world have declared "nom" to be an official word in universal vocabulary.  Yes, I do realize it is a bit of onomatopoeia, but it has truly become a actual word, too.

But beyond that, over a week ago I banned myself from baking.  This isn't an eternal ban, of course, but a long term ban until I have a really good excuse to bake something such as a special occasion or some serious PMSing.  I went on a baking craze in an effort to experiment with different vegan ideas and options and the result was a near destruction of my mother's-and-my-own attempts to lose weight.  Sure, we are aware of the little friend called moderation, but when there is a delectable raspberry crumble cake sitting on the counter each and every day and each pre-cut square costs 5 Weight Watcher points and yet they aren't even big squares, things get crumbly very fast.

Thus came the ban.  All was good aside from seeing so many delicious concoctions and having so many ideas bloom in my happy little brain, until it set in that I used the last of my Earth Balance vegan butter-stuff for the crumble cake.  I have no need for the butter replacement if I'm not baking, but the absence of it is like the absence of a very crucial daily medication.  What if I need brownies?  Or cookies?  WHAT IF I GET MY PERIOD AND THERE IS NO FAKE BUTTER WITH WHICH TO BAKE A CRAVING CURE?!?!  Relax, self, Trader Joe's is a walk away.  And each time I am out and able to stop at a store that carries my baking wonder, I keep myself away and say not yet, self, you don't need it.  There is a baking ban.  And so the torture continues.

Oh, but it gets worse.  The past few days I've had some sort of stomach-bug-evil-spirit-within-me.  It started out like an upset stomach and soreness all over.  Then it was like somebody punched me in the gut.  It's on and off and I'm feeling better, but all those delicious happy foods that I'd normally nom on?  Nope.  Try bland fake-chicken soup and noodles or bland crackers and rice cakes.  Bland cereal.  Perhaps a banana if I feel well enough.  I haven't even had coffee in two days.  I crave well-seasoned goodness and yet nothing is appealing.  Woe is me!


I suddenly have a craving for a giant peanut butter cookie.  Oh, Lord.

Meatless Meatba...sauce

Believe it or not, my parents do partake in some of my meatless-meat dishes with me.  One of the "fake" creations that seem to please all of our picky palates is the meatless meatball.  Granted, not all meatless meatballs are created equal, a fact that was reiterated quite loudly last night.

On a previous grocery shopping trip with my mom, an errand we tend to do together and I enjoy very much (I'm not sure if she enjoys my company or considers it a nuisance.  She either truly doesn't mind or pretends I'm helpful like a good mother), I threw a bag of meatless meatballs into the shopping cart.  My mom then informed me that we already had some at home, but we should buy them anyhow.  Why?  I don't know, but eventually they'd be eaten.  I was skeptical about the existence of these other fake balls of non-meaty goodness because I had not seen any in quite awhile in either of our freezers.  My dad had mistaken the falafel for meatballs once and I luckily caught the mistake before any dishes were prepared.  Okay, I give my dad more credit than that.  He would have taken the package out of the freezer and seen FALAFEL written nice and big and laughed at the mistake.  He's a smart fellow.

So yesterday I decided we should all have pasta with meatless meatballs for dinner.  It's amusing how happy my parents are when I decide what's for dinner, especially early on in the day.  I like making them happy this way, but on a regular basis I tend to be unresponsive to any dinner suggestions because I just don't care and have no particular taste for anything...just like my parents.  How exciting we are!

So I followed the directions on the bag and dumped the lumps into a pot of pre-made pasta sauce (you know, the kind you buy in the jars at the grocery store all fancy like that).  I turned the stove on and let it rip.  As soon as I opened the bag, I knew these weren't top knotch meatless meatballs, though.  Half the bag was excess crumbles and the balls were oddly formed and hardly "balls" at all, more ovals and splats.

After several turns of the sauce with a spoon I noticed something very peculiar.  The meatless meatballs had disappeared!  And those excess crumbles?  Well they nearly quadrupled in number.  Kids, those so-called meatless meatballs crumbled to smithereens in the pot of sauce!

We settled for pasta and fake-meat-sauce for dinner.  It was not "zesty" as the bag of meatless meatballs said it would be, but it was satisfactory for an unexpected meat sauce.  I have leftovers waiting for me in the fridge come lunch time.

Next time?  Quality balls of meatless goodness by a maker that I know and trust.  

Chasing around for rocks

My love of baking is not exclusive to baking for the human species.  In our house you can find three cookbooks of recipes for dogs and a random smattering of loose recipes floating about for our four-legged furkids.  Spoiling those brats is not a hobby around here, it is a full-time job that we take on with pride and gusto.

If you have not been blessed with a great big Bailey-yawn in the face, let me try to describe to you the stench that miniature dachshund emits from within her little muzzle.  It is as if our town decided to use her mouth as a landfill.  Or she became a garbage disposal.  Or a fish graveyard.  Or perhaps all of the above.  Bill, our "tweenie weenie,"  is not much better in the oral department.

Randomly flipping through one of the doggy-cookbooks a few days ago, I spotted a recipe for after-dinner mints for dogs.  PERFECT!  Overexcited?  Yes, as I usually get when it comes to anything canine.

*Note:  I will handle meat products to be fed to dogs (or cats or any other naturally meat eating animal.)  Reason?  Dogs are naturally carnivorous and need the meat and it's nutrients to live a healthy life.  We have bred dogs to also digest grains and vegetables, but nature created the dog as a primarily carnivorous animal.  Just look at the animal's jaw, for Dingo's sake!  On a happy note, I have not yet found a cookie recipe that requires meat products that I've wanted to bake...those usually look nasty anyhow.

Most of the ingredients for these mints were pretty easy to find: parsley, mint, gluten-and-wheat-free flour (which is a plus because Bill has corn and wheat allergies), olive oil, and water.  The one thing that had me all over and in a craze was the activated charcoal.

What??

Okay, so the cookbook said that any good health food store would have activated charcoal.  I first went to Whole Foods because, well, they have everything.  Their charcoal only came in capsules.  I bought them in case I could cut the capsules open and use what was inside.  My parents convinced me to look for powdered charcoal.  I returned the capsules and went to a health food store 5 minutes from my house.  Only capsules.  I bought them.  I checked www.gnc.com and www.walgreens.com and I'm pretty sure powered charcoal is either not buyable or VERY hard to find.

So, tonight I snipped open those capsules and got to it!  But I didn't realize there would be such a POOF with each snip.  Before I looked like Julie Andrews and Dick Van Dyke in Mary Poppins, I settle on half the charcoal the recipe called for.  I knew as I mixed the dough that it wouldn't turn out right.  The picture in the book showed beautiful round cookie-mints of a golden yellow hue speckled green with parsley and mint.  My dough was gray and mucky from charcoal.  After baking the necessary 25 minutes, they were little rocks of gray muck.

I followed the directions minus half a tablespoon of charcoal.  I read the recipe several times over to figure out my mistake and it was too simple to have gone wrong anywhere.

So now sit 29 rocks on the stove which will be tossed tomorrow because I don't want to kill my spoiled beasties.  If I feel generous, I'll look in a different cookbook and whip up some other tasty treat.  Did I mention they're supposed to be on diets?

Mushrooms and Mistakes, Oh My!

Yesterday I wanted something tasty and interesting for lunch.  I was bored with the usuals, you know, peanut butter, hummus and veggies, cereal, etc.  I thought I'd make myself a little plate of pasta with sauteed mushrooms for a change.  There was what I thought to be just enough eggless pasta left in a bag in the cabinet for me without having to open a new bag or box, and we have had a carton of mushrooms sitting in the fridge for awhile now.

I popped the pasta in a small saucepan of water.  I know, I know.  Start lecturing me now.  You're supposed to give the pasta plenty of room to swim and you're supposed to salt the water because it's the only time you can season the pasta itself.  I've heard it countless times on the Food Network, that channel is always on in this house.  But, I'm a nut for saving water and not using a bigger pot than I really have to.  I'm also a nut for using as little salt/sodium as possible.  High blood pressure, heart disease, obesity, you name it and somebody in my family probably has it.  I might be a little crazy about the salt thing, but every little bit adds up.  Plus, I've never really tasted the difference between salted water pasta and plain water pasta.  *Shrug*

While the pasta boiled, I sprayed a frying pan with cooking spray (I also try to use as little oil as possible because I'm trying to trim the waistline.  I know you need oil in moderation so I usually save it for dinner and things like hummus.)  I dropped in the mushrooms and let them sizzle away in their own juices.  Mushrooms are fantastic that way.  You can get mushrooms nice and browned and deliciously sauteed with no oil at all because they always let off so many of their own juices.  Yum yum yum!  I sprinkled some garlic and herb seasoning on them and some red pepper flakes.

Note to the pantry keepers of the world:  Keep your seasonings up to date.  In this house, we use until it's gone.  The stuff we use on a regular basis is gone before it goes bad or goes bland, so we never really noticed how old some of our herbs and spices were until we started getting creative and using new recipes.  Those red pepper flakes?  They came from our old house and we've been living in this house for over six years now.  I could not taste them.  We need some new flakes.  I've been buying new stuff little by little, but spices are not cheap!  Giving a house warming gift or bridal shower gift?  Give SPICES!

Anyhow, my lunch was delicious, except a little oil could have helped.  That, and the little bit of pasta I thought I was making ended up being enough for two servings...and I ate it all.  Uh oh.

I think I get more joy out of cooking these dishes than eating them sometimes.  That's why I had to take a picture of my beautiful mushrooms.

I bought wheat flour yesterday so I could make a scone recipe that's been lingering on my invisible to-do list of recipes for a long time now.  It's a soda bread scone from Vegetarian Times magazine.  I didn't tinker with the recipe other than using dried cranberries instead of currants.

At least I didn't think I was tinkering.

Until I put the scones into the oven.

And realized.

I used the 1 tsp. measuring spoon instead the 1/2 tsp. measuring spoon for the cinnamon, baking soda, and coarse salt.  Oops.

Despite that nearly fatal mistake, they came out quite tasty.  They are just barely sweet as soda bread should be and are quite good for you, too.  I got 15 out of the recipe instead of the 6 it said I would get because we have a mini scone pan here that I used.  That might also contribute to the texture.  They're a little chewier and crispier on the edges than I imagine they might have been had I used the correct amount of baking soda and perhaps cut down on the baking time for large scones.

But have no fear.  They are being eaten.  Mmmmmm.  This morning I had one with peanut butter on it.  I love peanut butter.  Peanut butter and I have a special relationship.

I suppose my "book" review today will be the magazine, Vegetarian Times.  I've been a subscriber for about a year now and I absolutely love it.  It's for lacto-ovos and vegans alike.  Not only is it chock-full of great recipes that I've even tried successfully on my omnivorous parents, but the health and beauty articles are a bonus.  I try to push the health articles on my parents all the time to their chagrin.  There have been articles about digestion and joints and whatnot that I found fascinating but I get the feeling they push off reading them because they come from a vegetarian magazine.  I read the articles out loud to them if I'm feeling pushy enough.  I'm a fabulous daughter that way.  They can't wait for me to move out.

Anyhow, if you need a good resource that comes to your mailbox on a regular basis, I highly recommend VT.

And So Begins a New Year

It's been longer than I wanted in between posts here.  Generally when I start a blog, I post a few times and then the blog dies.  I told myself I'd blog here A LOT and here I went a weekend without even reading my friends' blogs.

But I have an excuse!  It was a holiday weekend for me.  In case you didn't catch on, I'm Jewish.  It was the Jewish new year this weekend, Rosh Hashanah.

So, to update everyone, I made my own challahs for the holiday.  Challah is a traditional Jewish egg bread, but seeing as I only eat humane certified eggs I couldn't just eat any store bought challah!  So I made my own.  Four adorable little challahs.  Even my mom called them cute.  I don't normally bake bread and I've never made a challah from scratch (bought the pre-made dough already braided in the freezer section and popped it in the oven, yes).  Let me tell you, kneading dough should be a sport.  But the challah turned out better than I expected.  It was a bit doughier than I would have liked, but it was good enough for my parents to eat with me.  We still have two in the freezer, but they won't go to waste.  We love bread here.

I also made those butterhorns I posted about earlier.  I bought vegan sour cream and used all vegetable spread instead of butter.  They didn't turn out half-bad, either.  It wasn't easy.  The dough didn't chill to the firmness that the original dough does.  That could be because I didn't chill it overnight as my mom does, but I have a feeling it was the ingredient swap.  The dough consistency made rolling the cookies especially difficult.  The fragile dough was sticky and tore on many of the cookies.  Oh well, it was an experiment!  The final product tastes pretty darn good.  They are a little drier than the original and less buttery in flavor, but tasty nonetheless.  Of course my mom prefers the original.  I'm sure I would were I not almost-vegan.  This baking thing is all about experimenting and trial and error right now.

My next experiment will be with agave nectar.  But I'm running into conflicting information about the sweetener, so I'll have to do a little research first.

Happy eating!

Being a Crybaby

I could tell you all a fabulous rendition of what happened today (and it's only 2:23pm CST!) but I think it would be easier on my lazy-ass self and perhaps a bit enjoyable on your part if I simply copy and paste the email I sent to my parents whining like a small child.

First, you may need a mini glossary:

Butterhorn- a cookie often compared to rugelach that my mom is famous for baking.  The recipe can be found in The All New Portal to Good Cooking, 1972 edition.  I am attempting to make a dairy-free version of this recipe.

Bill and Bailey- My family's two spoiled dachshunds.  If we leave the garbage can in the kitchen on the floor when we leave, Bill knocks it over and they feast on grossness.  Eww.

Dingo- Not to be confused with the canine from down under, this is a brand of dog treat.  The original (the brand has now created a whole line of treats) is a knotted bone with meaty, jerky stuff wrapped inside.  Bill and Bailey LOVE them and steal them from each other and hide them from each other and LOVE them.

Dominick's- The local grocery store chain.

Trader Joe's- an awesome grocery store chain found nationwide that carries amazing stuff



Okay then, here's the email...

Mommy and Daddy,

This is my five minutes of being a complaining five year old.

I slipped out of the house soooo easily today after giving Bill and Bailey the pre-used dingos on the kitchen counter.  I drove to Dominick's to buy some stuff we need for butterhorns and the spiced tea recipe Mom and I want to try (as well as band-aids and foot spray...)  Well, everything was fine until I got to the stick margarine.  It turns out that Dominick's only carries butter and partial vegetable oil spread in stick form.  There are no purely vegetable-based options.  That means the stick stuff we've been using has DAIRY in it.  UGH.  I took two boxes for you guys to use but was full of the irritables at the fact that only tub stuff was vegan--and not recommended for baking.  

But I figured nothing I was buying would rot/spoil/curdle/or do the like in the 5 minutes it would take me to park, run into Trader Joe's, buy some vegan sticks, and get back in the car.  

I was nearly hit by 2 different cars in the same aisle of that darned parking lot!  AHHHH!!!!!  It's a Wednesday afternoon, why aren't people at work???  

So I went into the store all shaking with adrenaline and frustration.  I get to the buttery section and it's all PURE BUTTER!  Of all places, Trader Joe's only has pure butter???  What????  So I start looking at the tubs and see that some of it is vegetable junk.  There was a vegan brand.  I looked it over and on the uses suggested it said baking.  So I bought it.  I know it goes against the don't-use-tubbed-butter-or-margarine-for-baking, but it says it right on the tub!  And the cashier complimented my ring.  So I felt a little better.

Until I tried carrying the two paper bags I requested at Dominick's at the same time to the garage door (because my opener still doesn't work on Mom's side I had to open it with the key pad).  One of the bags broke.  I finally got inside to woofs and squeaks (Bailey was hiding with a dingo under the blanket she was under when I gave her the dingo upon leaving) and was so happy for it until....GARBAGE!  I was so proud of myself for my get away that I forgot to put the damned thing up.  UUUUUGGGGGGGGHHHHHH.  There wasn't much inside and I think a fruit fly died being sucked into the dust buster, but I think I might need a tranquilizer now or something.  Maybe that entire chocolate bar from the freezer.  

*sigh*

I hope you guys are doing much much better.

xoxo

Me

The Elusive "D"

Elusive may not be the precise word I am looking for, but I like it and so I will stick with it.

Growing up in a Reform Jewish household, I learned at a young age what the two possible kosher symbols on food were ("Circle K" and "Circle U") and what words following these symbols meant.  Meat obviously means the food contains meat.  D or diary means the food contains some sort of milk related product.  Parve means the food contains neither meat nor dairy (but for vegans, it could still contain eggs).  As a vegetarian, this became exceptionally useful.  Things labeled "chicken flavored" or the like may not actually contain meat.  Suddenly I didn't have to read all labels all the time.

This was all fine and dandy until I gave up dairy.  Suddenly anything certified kosher seemed to have the big fat D hanging off of it.  My once nifty trick has turned into a nightmare.

What's worse?  I started becoming skeptical.  It started when I noticed that the hazelnut syrup I bought for making coffee drinks had the "D" on it.  Hazelnut syrup?  What?  So I read the ingredients over and nothing popped out as dairy to me.  I had Mom look it over.  Same for her.  We had my dad look it over since he's all food-technology-expert-dude and he said that nothing was dairy in it but he saw a lot of "really nasty chemicals."  Fabulous.  Let's put some really nasty chemicals into our coffee!  His explanation?  Maybe the ingredients were grown on whey.

But how does that explain the exhorbitant varieties of popcorn that are not butter flavored nor do they list dairy ingredients but are marked as dairy?

I could go on.

So now the question stands: Do I eat these "supposedly" dairy products?  Or do I forfeit their deliciousness to the kosher gods?

I just said "kosher gods" on the week of Rosh Hashanah.  That can't be good.

What Most People Don't Think About

I went on a job interview yesterday.  In addition to dancing in my seat while driving the hour to get there (the economy really does hit hard), I started to think about food.

I brought a peanut butter sandwich and coffee in the car with me as breakfast, so I wasn't hungry.  Why was I thinking about food?

As I got closer to the office, I scoped out the restaurants nearby.  My thoughts?  What kind of vegan options do they have around here?  What are the eating habits of the people in this office?  What would they think of an almost-vegan coworker, should I be hired?  

Leave it to me to think about that on the way to an interview.

I'm not so sure about how the interview went.  I know I could have done better but I also could have done a whole lot worse.  We'll see!  Until then, let's go drain that tofu sitting in the fridge...

I Do Not Like Plastic Wrap

I do not like plastic wrap for several reasons.

1. It sticks to itself. Once plastic wrap has stuck to itself, it is incredibly hard to unstick. There goes some perfectly good wrap.

2. If you are trying to preserve freshness, a plastic container is more eco-friendly and does a better job anyhow.

3. The serrated edge. I have never been good at the pull-and-tear of plastic wrap which causes the earlier mentioned sticking. But as I learned last night, the serration is dangerous.

After Mom sent me a lovely forwarded email about the amazingness of bananas (they are truly amazing), I decided banana bread was in order. Mom doesn't like bananas unless they are mashed into goop and baked into a delicious bread with chocolate chips dancing throughout. I don't blame her--it is quite decadent.

Since I've been on a look-through-Jill's-own-personal-cookbooks thing, I decided to check out what sort of new recipe I could find in The Ultimate Peanut Butter Book, a cookbook my parents bought for me, knowing full well that I have no willpower against peanut butter.

After messing with the recipe a bit to make it more waist-friendly, along came a peanut butter banana bread (with chocolate chips added, of course) to kill any peanut allergy. Moist and peanut buttery and chocolaty and mmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.

So I pre-sliced the loaf in order to see how many "servings" I could get out of it and calculate the Weight Watchers points. There wasn't a proper container tall enough for all the slices, so I thought a temporary lid of plastic wrap would do. Until I went for the box of wrap.

I felt each serration in my finger. The thought sends chills down my back. Slice, slice, slice. Of course I jumped, squealed, and stuck my finger in my mouth in a matter of 15 seconds. Did you know that we stick our wounds in our mouths instinctively? Our saliva contains a chemical or compound or something that helps to heal wounds more quickly. So, go ahead, lick your wounds!

My right index finger (and I'm a righty, gosh dang it) is still tender to the touch and sports a nice white line if you take off my neon colored bandage. I thought it would be cool to go around with a bright band on my finger so people can say "and you're how old?" Actually, they're the ones with the antibiotic junk already applied. Spiffy. But the cut is all white from being moist, so my picture can't give you the full effect of my injured glory. I tried to make up for it with my face.

In other news:

I am going to start recommending/reviewing books. They will have something to do with food and/or vegetarianism. Yea, I know how much you wanted to know my thoughts on Pride and Prejudice, but I have to stick to the theme!

It's only fitting to start with the Ultimate Peanut Butter Book. There are many meat dishes in the book, so don't dive in expecting a vegetarian heaven, but what is animal friendly is creative and delicious. A recipe for a peanut butter sandwich is not just spread some pb on the bread and go, it involves baking the bread and making the spread! Duuuuude. You can also fiddle with the recipes as I like to do and use meat substitutes, dairy substitutes, or just get ideas for your own dishes. Mmmm, peanut butter. Now I'm hungry. And my finger needs a rest.

A Labor of Love

I hope everybody had a fabulous holiday weekend.

I can't say I didn't get quite a bit of rest and relaxation in. Sleeping until nearly 11am isn't exactly a back breaking effort.

But, trying to be a vegan on Labor Day weekend is a bit of a workout.

Friday:

Mom and I went to see Julie and Julia, finally. Everybody and their mothers (quite literally) had seen it without me while I sat there talking about how much I really really wanted to see it. But the thing is, everyone saw it with her mother! So I dragged my mom who wanted to see it anyhow so I guess that's not really dragging...

It was an adorable movie. Critics really don't know a good movie when it's slapped in their faces like a non-dairy whipped-topping pie. The entire movie I had the criticisms of the At the Movies guys going through my head and boy did they just have sticks up their butts the day they saw it. It really is a mom-and-daughter movie. Even the amount of animal-devouring didn't bother me. Heck, if it bothered me, I wouldn't be able to survive in this world. I was a little bothered by the lobsters. That's all I'll say so that I don't ruin anything for those who haven't seen the movie.

The moral of the story is: If Julia Child can live into her 90s after that much butter, then maybe Paula Deen actually does stand a chance.

As for me, I'll stick to my margarine and soy milk.

Saturday:

This past weekend was Irish Fest in downtown Long Grove. For those not familiar with the town, there is a "downtown" area that is composed of very old buildings circa 1800s that have been converted into shops. It makes for a nice little shopping day if it's sunny out and not too hot or too cold. My parents wanted to go because this would have been the weekend they came home from Ireland had their anniversary trip not been cancelled (long story short, they were supposed to go on a week-long tour of Ireland to belatedly celebrate their 30th anniversary but my dad busted his knee again. Ouch.). It was cute, but we didn't stay long. We hadn't entered Bill or Bailey into the dog contests and we hadn't come at a big event time. We didn't eat anything, either. My parents bought some cookies at a baked goods stand, but there was nothing egg-and-dairy free there. To my surprise, I wasn't the first person to ask about those ingredients...I just don't think the women selling the stuff had any idea what it meant. I'll just have to have Robyn, over in her little Irish world outside Baltimore, bake me some vegan goodies and send them over.

Sunday:

Dad wanted to take Mom and I to Apple Holler. Apple Holler is an apple orchard/farm/restaurant/bakery/how many slashes can I get in here? on the border of Illinois and Wisconsin. It was a pretty good idea, actually. There had been quite a bit of alpaca talk at our house lately and he remembered that I wanted to visit an alpaca (take me to a farm to play with the animals and I'll be happy for hours. Yea. I'm a kid.) The "alpaca" on site turned out to be a llama moseying around with the goats, but he was cute nonetheless.

Apple Holler is definitely designed for families with small children. You can feed the goats, go through a child-friendly corn maze, pick apples, play in their kiddie corral, etc. So, after watching the kiddos do their thing for less than 5 minutes, we went inside for lunch. The breakfast buffet was just going down as we sat down and the lunch buffet was going up. As a lacto-ovo vegetarian, breakfast buffets were heaven on Earth. As a vegan, it's like hell on a plate. This buffet was the smallest I had ever seen. A cute little menu listed what we'd find and the three of us knew before going up that I couldn't eat anything because it would either contain butter or be cooked in butter. Nope, not even a bowl of oatmeal.

Rule #1: Don't be afraid of the wait staff and cooks. They aim to please. Dude, they work for tips.

The waitress talked to the cook who whipped me up some oil-fried potatoes (mmm, crusty arteries!) and a thick slab of white bread toast with jelly. I'm not one for white bread or jelly, but it was actually quite tasty. I really wanted cinnamon apples, cornbread, and pancakes, but I take what I can get. I had a stomach ache earlier that morning anyhow. Maybe it was destiny?

We then bought a big bag of fresh picked apples so we can bake a delicious apple crisp with margarine. Woohoo!

Now, what to make for dinner tonight?

Let me introduce myself...

Hello!

I am going to make this as straightforward as possible while still being myself. Ha. Here goes nothing.

So, as you can see I have started this blog, The Adventures of an Almost Vegan, to document my glorious journey through the path of veganism. That makes it sound like I'll be finishing at some point, doesn't it? Well, have no fear, friends. I don't intend to take up animal consumption again. With one exception which I will explain shortly.

Who

I am Jill. I am a recent graduate of an MFA program meaning I have 3 degrees and no job. I like to call myself a writer. I am also a daughter, sister, pets' human, cook, consumer, and so forth. I am many things. I am a vegetarian.

What

Yea. That almost-vegan thing throws a lot of people. Sometimes I call it pseudo-vegan. I completely understand if the terms bug you, make you angry, or make you want to gauge my eyes out. I can see how it is like fish eaters calling themselves pesca-vegetarians. There is no such thing. If you kill an animal to eat it, you are not a vegetarian. Simple as that. So what's the with the almosts and pseudos? I refuse to eat dairy, but I will eat eggs that have been certified humane or that come from farms overseen by the American Humane Association. I don't eat them often because they are pricey, but they are in my fridge. See? I'll show you...

When

Nine years ago as of August 28, 2009, actually. I was in middle school when I started my quest towards vegetarianism and by the time I was a sophomore in high school, I was a lacto-ovo vegetarian. Just this past month I cut out dairy and most eggs.

Why

This is the big one. I don't do it for health reasons, although I am healthier and happier than I ever have been. I do it for ethical reasons. I don't believe animals should have to suffer or die for my consumption. Back in high school I thought dairy and eggs were okay. Cows and chickens aren't dying to give me milk and eggs. This summer I read a couple of books (well, one and a half...I'm still working on one...) and was reminded of the truth. Most egg farms don't treat the chickens well at all and the conditions are horrendous. There is no humane way to get dairy. I immediately went vegan. Then I found a few brands of eggs that are "humane." These eggs are either humane certified to ensure the chickens are treated properly, or overseen by the American Humane Association for the very same reason. I have no problem eating an egg from a happy, healthy chicken. And let me tell you, you can taste the difference!

And so, folks, I present to you the Almost-Vegan. And here are my stories, which should be far more entertaining.